“When you find your path, you must not be afraid. You need to have sufficient courage to make mistakes. Disappointment, defeat, and despair are the tools God uses to show us the way.”
― Paulo Coelho, Brida
Face it, we are all going to screw up every once in a while. We are going to say something completely ridiculous at the wrong time, sending our friend into a frenzy. We will mess up a recipe, drop a glass, paint the wrong color, write the worst letter, or even eat the last piece of chocolate in a house full of women.
I do not think the last one is forgivable? … or is it?
Seriously, there will be times when mess ups happen, and what do we do then? What do you do when your best friend is mad at you for a slip of the tongue?
This is the best time to take inventory and send yourself some love. Assess the situation and apologize. Sincerely apologize to your friend, and then:
“Forgive yourself for thinking you did anything wrong”!
Mishaps happen, and I know I am (or used to be) very hard on myself when something goes wrong because of something I said or did. Last year I made a pasta salad which turned out to be disgusting. I started berating myself for throwing it out, and wasting food. Then, I took a step back and gave myself a big hug for even trying, for being creative, and allowing myself to take risks.
“Freedom is not worth having if it does not include the freedom to make mistakes.”
― Mahatma Gandhi
Can’t stop myself from trying new things.
Obviously I never tried this recipe again, yet I am still going to find new ones…
My point is: Self-love in a world which is sometimes filled with people who hate on each other, is a challenge thus, I will continue past the 40 Days asking myself in the moment “What do I need to feel ok?” . I do not want to revert back to the woman who, just a year ago, could not even look at herself in the mirror, or get mad at herself for dropping her favorite plate. No. Plates can be replaced, but the pain after the self-bullying includes a long road of healing.
I want to love my mistakes along with the rest of my accomplishments.
It is in making those errors of judgement which we learn to cope better moving forward. It is the wrong turn one makes, which, if carefully pondered upon, will help us take the “other way” to happiness. And honestly, who said it was the “wrong turn” anyhow? Have you ever gotten lost on a trip, only to find new things to see? Or avoided a long road of traffic? Going in the wrong direction, at times, can be a miracle. I’ve seen some amazing scenery while lost… 🙂
It is all in the way you see it.
Happiness is not a destination, it is a way of being. I cannot be happy if I am constantly mad at myself. Loving myself includes this understanding. No way is the wrong way… all paths lead to where we want to go.. if we are truly aware of what is going on.
Today, day 39 of 40, I am going to love my shortcomings, my screw ups and my mistakes… and in turn, if I know better, I will do better..
“I am glad that I paid so little attention to good advice; had I abided by it I might have been saved from some of my most valuable mistakes.”
― Edna St. Vincent Millay